What most people miss is that it is important to accept where you are now, so you are truly striving to become better, rather than striving to become someone else. Acceptance is being able to love and validate who you are, even the parts you would eventually like to change. By accepting each of these parts of ourselves, even the parts we want to change, it allows us to truly open up and accept others as they are. This creates and cultivates a lasting love.
There are a few factors I would encourage you to look at when dealing with the topic of acceptance:
• First, get to know yourself and what you believe in. Ask yourself these questions: Who are you? What is important to you in your life? What do you believe? These may seem like simple questions, but you would be surprised at how many people have never asked them of themselves.
• Second, check your integrity level. How honest are you currently with yourself? How honest are you with others? Do you always communicate your true desires and wants to others? What do you believe to be true about yourself? What are your goals? Do you honestly believe you can achieve your goals? Do you honestly feel you deserve them?
• Third, look at your current acceptance level. Do you openly accept yourself? Do you like yourself? Do you accept others? What characteristics do you like about yourself? Which ones would you like to change? Do you see a reason to love and accept yourself the way you are right now?
• Fourth, embrace the fact that you are doing the best you can with what you have. I believe that people sincerely do the best they can with the knowledge and resources they have at the time, especially when they are honest, open, and accepting of themselves and others. Giving you a break and acknowledging yourself for doing a great job now is acceptance. Let go of desires to do better, be better, or be different. This will allow you to see others in the same light, enriching all of your existing relationships as well as future relationships.
• Fifth, let go of any guilt that you may have. Guilt is a useless emotion. As far as love and acceptance are concerned; the emotion of guilt really holds no place. If you truly feel guilty about something, it is usually because you are not comfortable with a choice you have made. Instead of feeling the useless emotion of guilt, learn from the choices you have made and make different choices in the
future.
• Finally, understand your motivations. Understand your likes and dislikes about yourself. A desire to constantly grow, learn, and improve is honorable. Just make sure that you are simultaneously accepting and loving all areas of yourself, even the areas you want to change.
Relationships where one or both parties aren't truly able to be themselves are destined for failure. You will quickly realize that you can't live in-authentically. Your energy is so much better served if people are allowed to be themselves and love and grow together for who they are. Once you are able to master acceptance, you are well on your way to finding enriching, fulfilling relationships with all.
